By Mercedes Gruzeski and Brooks Kaskela, employees of Raise the Future

The holiday season is upon us. This time of year can be challenging for kids from hard places, and even more difficult with the added stress of a global pandemic. Below are five helpful tips to get you and your family through the holiday season.

1) Connect. The power of connection goes a long way, no matter how big or small. There are many ways to connect with one another during the holidays. Talk with your child(ren) about their favorite holiday activities and look for opportunities to do them together. Consider connecting virtually with your extended family more often during these trying times. You might even enjoy playing some games together virtually. Carve out time and space to have fun!

2) Prepare. It is common for children from hard places to experience grief and sadness during the holidays. For example, some children may have a hard time enjoying the holidays because they feel that by doing so, they are not honoring their biological family. Invite them to share their past holiday experiences with you. The more you know, the better you can prepare to meet their needs. Remember that grief expresses itself in many forms. It may look like sadness, but it may also manifest as anger or withdrawing from others. Children from hard places can also struggle with transitions, so it’s a good idea to encourage your family to develop a holiday schedule together: Communicate about your family’s plans for the holidays and make it clear what everyone can expect. This allows children to feel more secure in having an idea of what will happen, which is key to smooth transitions.

3) Provide. Because children from hard places are likely to struggle during the holidays, be sure to provide a space for them to express themselves safely. This could be a specific spot in the home that is just for them (i.e., a cozy corner) or going for a walk to decompress. Talk to them about what they need for the holiday to go smoothly.

4) Support. Support children in expressing themselves in whatever way they need. This could look like providing items that help meet their sensory needs, such as weighted blankets, sensory toys, and fidgets. Another way is to sit with them during their hard times. Being right there with them when they are struggling lets them know that you will be with them no matter how bad things get.

5) Self-Care. What does this look like for you? Is it a bubble bath? Baking or cooking? How do you connect with yourself? What are your own triggers and buttons that could be pushed during this holiday season? Try to proactively plan for that and intentionally do things that help you relax. In addition to decreasing the stress of the child(ren) in your home, think of ways to make this holiday season less stressful for you. Considering setting realistic and achievable goals for yourself, especially during the pandemic. Taking care of yourself is the biggest priority because when you cannot control what is happening, you must challenge yourself to control the way you are responding to what is happening. Self-care is how you take your power back.